The term Swingers’ which is sometimes otherwise titled wife swapping’ or in this modern day and age partner swapping’, refers to non-monogamous couples who enjoy engaging in sexual acts with others as a leisure or social activity. Swingers’ parties are traditionally the meeting places for these like-minded and sexually open people. So, what goes on at a swingers party’, how do I get involved and where did this idea come from.
I have been sexually active since my late teens, my first experiences being hopelessly romantic. University however opened my eyes to a whole other world of sex. Sex was not just something sensual to be shared between two people who were in love. This was something bigger. It was something that could be used in many different ways, and indeed enjoyed in just as many. Once I realized that sex was in fact just sex, and was a thing that could be enjoyed without worries over taboos or judgments, I went in search of similarly minded people. What I found was astounding. I found that there were people everywhere who would use sex to spice up sex lives that otherwise lacked variety or indeed to explore a curiosity. My motivation was the latter. I did however also come across many people who were in committed relationships. These couples would seek at these parties that which they didn’t get at home. There were women in straight relationships that were bi-curious and so would long to be with a woman. There were couples who longed to share one. There were women who wanted to have sex with several men at the same time and men who wanted to be with multiple partners. These are the places that they were open to do so. Places where sexual curiosity and the willingness to explore it were not only condoned or allowed but were in fact actually championed. Believe me, the more I looked, the more I found out that what is considered to be the norm’ for most people when it comes to sex in a relationship, was not the norm’ for everyone.
I found out that swinging’ as a social or leisure activity began during the sexual revolution’ in the sixties, an era renowned for its free love’ attitude. A time firmly steeped in a fight for peoples’ rights. Women’s liberation and civil rights and in amongst it all there was another fight; the one for sexual liberation. People fought for the right to explore their own sexual desires and appetites as well as those of others and to do so without fear of reprisals social or otherwise. The more that I delved into this unseen world and the more that I found out, the more I wanted to get involved.
I was in my early twenties when I attended the first of what was to become a fair few Swingers’ parties. I had been sexually active for years; years that had been spent learning and experimenting as best I could in your average or normal’ sexual relationship. I was, in my own estimation at least, hitting my sexual peak. I was now more confident than I had been in previous years and had overcome many an insecurity that would have stood in my way beforehand. I was in a great relationship with a sexy young Spanish girl with whom I had some of the best sex of my life so far. It was wild and passionate as well as experimental. We would talk openly about our desires and fantasies and though I found out that hers were a touch more intense than my own, I also saw a freedom in the honesty. Why should we settle for sex that leaves certain desires unfulfilled? But that being said, where does one go to explore these dark desires that we had now made real by speaking out loud? So we went in search of this sexual liberation and found it in the form of a friend of mine. This guy had been my friend for years and there were even times that we probably would have shared a girl and had a threesome if it hadn’t been for taboo and judgement (sexual freedoms worst enemy it seems). One evening I ended up talking with him at dinner as our girlfriends chatted on the other side of the table. To my surprise he told me that he and his girlfriend had been having similar conversations lately. We decided that we were too good friends to risk jumping into bed together and experimenting with each other’s better half and so we began to look for swingers parties’ in our city. There were a few to be found when we looked in the right places. We chose what looked like the classiest one and signed up eager to attend.
There we all were, dressed up and at the door of a large Victorian house on the edge of the city. This was beautiful. We were greeted with champagne as we joined a hall full of other couples which included some cheap London escorts, surrey escorts and some canary wharf escorts who all looked as excited and nervous as we did. First we talked and laughed with attractive members of the collective flock, then as the bubbles kicked in and the tension rose, the flirting turned to touching and kissing. The party was split into three areas, each more intense than the next. It being my first party, I only made it to the first room where sex with multiple partners was as steamy as it got. My girlfriend had moved on to the next room in search of that which we came for and left me in the care of three young women. Limitations tested and hunger sated, we reconvened a little later on and left the party in a quiet collection of smiles. The next day we got together to talk about it.
The discussion made me realize that if you are open and honest with yourself and your partner then yes, for the right couples Swingers parties’ can be very exciting indeed.